Planning = Fun

What will the atmosphere be at that first big social event at shul, when suddenly there are lots of people all in the same room? Old faces, newcomers, people on the fringes, the newly-enthused, hopefully many first-time-in-ages people? Will old cliques reform or will a spirit of welcome and excitement bind everyone together? Will people be left out?

Whatever we expect, we can affect the outcome.

Eastern promise

Several years ago, the events team at Alei Tzion ran a Shabbat dinner at a kosher Indian restaurant. Tickets sold quickly to an eclectic combination of members and non-members. Even with corkage, pre-paid bottles of wine also sold well. The evening promised to be very jolly.

We were concerned though, that the guests were a combination of friends and strangers. With everyone at separate tables, people might not mix at all.

Old India hands

To prevent cliques forming, we adapted the old Top Trumps card game, which became ‘Raj Trumps’, a customised icebreaker. Each guest was dealt a random hand of cards picturing things connected with the British in India,* competing over the statistics on each card, and winning or losing cards as they went.

Circulating between courses, guests could if they wished open conversation in a formulaic way, without requiring introductions or particular confidence. They were incentivised by the self-introductions, but also by a drinkable prize for the table with the most cards at the end of three rounds, which encouraged people to go to neighbouring tables to try their luck.

By providing a ‘gamified’, almost formal way for people to introduce themselves, we encouraged people to mix, thereby laying the groundwork for a spirited shared experience in the restaurant that night.

‘How do you do?’

For lots of reasons, a card game is not going to reintegrate everyone after more than a year of Zoom and isolation. But while we are all excited about bringing life back to shul, we have time to consider managing the process just a little, to give everyone a ‘way in’, and to give ourselves a better chance of initial momentum.

Getting everyone through the doors will be gratifying and a great success in itself. It may even be ‘just like old times’. But Heaven forbid we should let our minds be clouded with sepia-tinted

nostalgia! Times have changed, and we must do what we can to increase the likelihood of interpersonal relationships forming between as many people as possible. Raj Trumps may have been a game of chance, but social capital is not.

* We probably wouldn’t use this theme now, however tongue-in-cheek it was supposed to be.